The New Year
I woke up New Years day and I wanted menudo. I wasn't hungover, I was just tired and I've been feeling drained for awhile. I thought a good bowl of menudo will pick me up. After a little bit of thinking I realized that I didn't want it bad enough to spend 30 minutes driving to Hillsboro to get a bowl. The only good menudo I've found has been in Hillsboro. I wasn't going to eat the crap in a can. I gave up my dreams of menudo and wished I was back at my tia Irena's house and then went to get some coffee.
On my way to Powell's to get coffee I passed Laughing Planet Burritos. I don't like laughing planet, it's hippie Mexican food. Tofu pastor doesn't work for me. It's borderline sinful as far as I'm concerned. Possibly a hate crime.
Well, as I passed Laughing Planet they had a sign saying "psuedo menudo". I stopped and looked for a better explanation. What is psuedo menudo? I finally went inside and read a description of the soup. It was basically broth with chile paste, grilled vegetables, and tofu.
Do you want to piss me off? Do you hate me? Is there some specific reason why you want to knock me down and kick sand in my face? What did I ever do to you?
Taunt me with stupid ruined hippie versions of food I crave. I would deny Christ way more than three times just to get a descent tortilla at this point. Serve me bland enchiladas? You and Me, outside right now. You want to flaunt fake menudo to me? I'll cut you. If anybody is stupid enough to offer me bad cabrito they better be ready to take a midnight swim in the Colombia river with concrete shoes.
Muthafuckas.
Psuedo Menudo? People who do shit like this probably spit on the Virgin when nobody's looking.
I may be a little tense b/c I'm supposed to be working on my paper.
2 Comments:
umm, you weren't hungover, but I sure was. who knew petron and red wine would cause that kind of behavior.
I had menudo once in Mexico and it tasted like a stable. However I do generally understand your Mexican food issues. There's nothing like the real thing. Do they have taco trucks in your area? The best Mexican I've had is on the street, hands down, from taco trucks in L.A. After that restaurants have been disappointing. Even the non-hippy ones. (And I agree - Vegan Mexican is just culturally disrespectful. Fucking vegans. If you want a truly great taco al pastor, you might have to drive to Highland Park, L.A. and go to La Estrella taco truck on York.
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